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Friday, October 30, 2015

Learning Inside the Box


It is a little before 5 on a Wednesday morning, and I am driving through the dark streets of West Hartford. There are very few cars on the road. Few of us crazy enough to be ought and about. Where would one be going at such an ungodly hour? Well, it is time to come clean. I have caught the bug: I do CrossFit. 

If you had told me a few years ago that I would be getting up in the pitch black to go and lift weights and do push ups, I would have given you quite a quizzical stare. I like my sleep (a lot), and given my own medical history, I didn’t think I would ever be lifting anything heavier than my toddler.

Now, you are probably thinking, "What does Cross Fit have to do with church or ministry or formation?” Good question. Actually I think it has a fair amount to do. And I am not the only one. Just Google CrossFit and Church. Quite a number of articles and blog entries have been written about it in recent months. Even in The Washington Post.

Let me start by sharing my own story and how I have come to love CrossFit. 

When I was thirteen, I was diagnosed with bone cancer. The year of chemotherapy and the numerous surgeries that followed taught me a lot about my body and left it permanently changed. The tumor was in my left collarbone, and so, after the chemo shrunk the tumor, they removed my left collarbone. Because of the mobile nature of this bone, there is not yet (nor may there be in my lifetime) the technology to replace this bone. They cannot put a rod or a donor bone in the way they would if it were a vertical leg or arm bone. This means all the muscles in my left shoulder are now attached to each other rather than my collarbone, which means I don’t have the same skeletal stability in my shoulder that most people do. For instance, I cannot just align my skeleton and “rest” in plank position. 

On top of that one of my chemo drugs can have long term effects on my heart and so my doctors have been cautious about how much anaerobic exercise I do. Can you see why I might be skeptical of doing something that involved lifting 50 pounds above my head?

Over the years, I have sought out fitness options that help to strengthen my shoulders and to just keep me in good shape. I have done yoga and rowing. Both of those were great in many ways, but somehow they weren’t exactly the right fit. Then I started working for a bishop who is passionate about CrossFit. Listening to his stories got me intrigued. Then there was a Groupon for a Box (what you call a CrossFit gym) in my town . . . and so, I tried it a bit of a year ago and haven’t looked back. 

I realize CrossFit is not and will not be for everyone, and I must say it has provided some remarkable personal and professional lessons for me. I think one of the biggest reasons I have stuck with CrossFit (beyond the fact that I am probably in the best physical shape I have ever been and that feels good) is that it has changed my definition of what is possible. Given my medical history, I was very cautious about what I might be able to do in CrossFit, but from the day I started my coaches have found ways to scale and modify workouts. They always ensure that I can do something that is challenging, but never harmful or dangerous for me. When I started CrossFit, picking up my three year old was enough of a challenge. Today I can deadlift more than my own body weight, and I can lift 50 pounds above my head. I still can’t do a pull up, but I have faith that I will get there. My slow and steady progress over the past year has taught me to trust the process, to trust my coaches and to keep trying. I thought cancer had put limits on my body that could never be overcome. Amazingly they can. 

Needless to say, I cannot help but wonder what this model of self-transformation has to teach me as a leader in the Church. What does it look like to enable the same kind of spiritual transformation in those who love and follow Jesus? Do we do this as a Church? How might we do it better? 

I certainly think that the Christian life is an invitation to transformation, an invitation to live our lives in new ways, an invitation to redefine what is possible for ourselves and for the world around us. But how well are we living into that invitation? Are we deliberately engaged in transformation? How might we make church (and by church I mean the gathered community of followers of Jesus not just a building or Sunday morning worship) something that people will wake up in the dark to do because it brings them joy? As ordained leaders, as “coaches,” how can we better encourage and empower those with whom we have the privilege of serving? How might we give them the tools and the skills to test their own limits (in a supportive environment)? How do we inspire them with courage to be bold without being dangerous? 

I don’t know all the answers to these questions yet. And I am glad to be thinking about them. I do know that it is about taking small steps and doing something little each day. I also know it is about doing it community with good teachers. I know that if I can take the long view and trust the process and the leading of the Holy Spirit, I will end up somewhere I did not think was possible. I trust this is true for us as Church too. 

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